Category Archives: Behavioural Addiction

Daily Reading from Recovery Days May 8th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – sit comfortably

Just for today

The AA Just for Today card gives us the right attitude for dealing with each day. It was written by a non-alcoholic in the 1920’s well before AA was conceived. Other fellowships such as NA, have similar cards. They demonstrate the importance of constant awareness that we carry within us the potential for great joy or relapse and disaster. The card  reinforces the wisdom that today is the only one that matters. For most of us, to live in the past would mean to be a different person and to live in the future is dying in slow motion. Will I remember to live just for today because today is always today?

When your goal is spiritual growth and not a specific point in time and place, then you know that your journey will last for your lifetime. The words ‘A Day at a Time’ then start to make more sense. Progress, not perfection, is the way to view our life in recovery. We will never receive a certificate of success. It is enough to be living our lives along spiritual principles. Today I ask God for the perseverance to live my new life, a day at a time.

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Daily Reading from Recovery Days May 7th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – review expectations

Kindness

Today was a difficult day, said Pooh. There was a pause. Do you want to talk about it? asked Piglet. No, said Pooh after a bit. No, I don’t think I do. That’s alright, said Piglet, and he came and sat beside his friend. What are you doing? asked Pooh. Nothing, really, said Piglet. Only, I know what difficult days are like. I quite often don’t feel like talking about it on my difficult days either. But goodness, continued Piglet, difficult days are so much easier when you know you’ve got someone there for you.

A.A. Milne, Winnie the Pooh.

Am I ready to show kindness, even unasked?

We know when we have given or received kindness because of the warm feeling it brings. It lifts our spirits and strengthens us in ways that we don’t always appreciate. Everyone benefits from it. Today I will seek to offer kindness in the sure knowledge that I am helping myself by helping others.

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Daily Reading from Recovery Days May 6th by Chris B

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On this day in 1946 the AA Twelve Traditions were published

Twelve Traditions
The Twelve Traditions were formulated by early members of AA in response to the need to clarify certain principles and attitudes, for the sake of the integrity and long-term survival of the movement. Broadly speaking, these cover issues of administration, finance, aims and relations with other groups and society at large. They have fulfilled their purpose because since that time, the basic tenets and beliefs of AA have remained unchanged. We tend to take things for granted but in truth, it’s a record that not many institutions achieve. Am I grateful to the founders of AA?
An organisation that advises its members that compromise is fatal for recovery must match its actions to its words. So much of history tells of well-intentioned people who gradually failed to measure up to their original principles. It is part of my responsibility as a grateful beneficiary of this fellowship, to do my utmost to uphold the Twelve Traditions so that future generations will enjoy the fruits of this wonderful organisation. Today I give thanks to the founding fathers of all the Twelve Step fellowships.

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Daily Reading from Recovery days May 5th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – send positive thoughts

Kindness

Kindness is a greatly under-rated quality. The often quite random acts of kindness we may experience in our lives are seldom forgotten. They can mean more than great achievements or grandiose gestures. The barriers we put up to showing kindness to others are often unintentional: anxiety, fear, insecurity, and ambition are feelings most people experience regularly in this unpredictable world. We sense our need to address them, and this turns us inwards, leaving little time for considering the needs of others. Yet, if we can help others, we help ourselves and immediately start to feel better. Kindness soothes the troubled soul of both giver and receiver. Can I overcome my barriers to kindness?  

There is a balm in Gilead,

To make the wounded whole.

There is a balm in Gilead,

To heal the sin-sick soul.

Sometimes I feel discouraged

And think my work’s in vain,

But then the Holy Spirit

Revives my soul again.

Spiritual Hymn.

Can I find some of that light of unselfish kindness that I sometimes see in others? Today I ask God for the wisdom to see what makes me kinder and the courage to make that happen.

Today I Will……………………………………………………………………………

Daily Reading from Recovery Days May 4th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – relax your whole body gradually

Unconditional love

A small pet is often an excellent companion for the sick.

Florence Nightingale.

In our sickness and recovery from addiction, pets provide a focus of attention outside of ourselves. They give unconditional love, are non-judgmental and honest in showing their emotions. They are loyal and forgiving. The power of example shines bright on most pets, inspiring us to be better people. To feel trusted and loved by a pet can be an important moment in recovery. They say that the newly sober should learn relationships by first tending a plant, then a pet and then another human being. Will I strive to be the person that my pet thinks I am?   

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.                                                                          St Paul, Corinthians.

Perhaps I need to learn how to love. If so, I could do no better than to reflect on these words of St Paul which are as fresh as when they were written, nearly two thousand years ago. Today I ask God to grow in love, because nothing else matters.

Today I Will……………………………………………………………………………

Daily Reading from Recovery Days May 3rd by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – review expectations

Step Five

Step Four is known as the Step of courage and Step Five, where we: Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs, requires courage too. Of course, every single one of the Steps requires courage so it’s a good thing that we’re generally braver than we believe. The important thing is to take that first small venture into the unknown. Our Higher Power will not let us down. Am I ready to trust in the help of my Higher Power?

He who has courage despises the future. The words of the Roman Emperor and philosopher Marcus Aurelius tell us that he who makes the most of the present has no need to fear the future. We may procrastinate, we may even say that time itself will change things but, in reality, the only way to make change happen is for us to make that change happen, a day at a time. When we do so, our life will become like a book where each chapter is an improvement on the one before. I ask for God’s help and strength to find the courage to admit my wrongs to another person because without doing so, I cannot grow in my recovery.

Today I Will…………………………………………………………………..

Daily Reading from Recovery Days May 2nd by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – enjoy the moment

Head to heart

Think of the worst experience that you can remember, perhaps something that made you angry or ashamed. If you could have it cancelled, but on condition that everything that happened as a result would also be cancelled – would you do it? How much did you learn from that negative experience? The worst experience is often the greatest opportunity for growth. Change does not happen through the passing of information alone, but through the way things make us feel. Willingness to change means learning from the bad as well as the good. Am I truly willing to change?

The beauty of the Twelve Step programme is that you can keep growing in it for the rest of your life. When you hear someone speaking at a meeting and you think: That’s what I want, then you are feeling something as well as hearing it. The message goes from the head to the heart and that is how spiritual growth comes about. Today I am grateful to grow in the Twelve Step programme that never stops giving.

Today I Will……..……………………………………………

Daily Reading from Recovery Days May 1st by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – close eyes briefly

Good life

We are the heroes in the story of our lives. But, like in a Greek tragedy, the hero is usually the one who is the problem. Greek tragedy is about rage and grief and right and wrong and consequences that inevitably happen. It’s all a bit reminiscent of active addiction. The Greeks didn’t go in for happy endings much. They left that sort of thing to the imagination. They were desperate to explore morality and responsibility because they believed the only acceptable life was one lived with integrity, honour and virtue. We could all benefit from a study of Greek tragedy but few of us will manage it. But we can still be heroes. Am I ready to live as a hero in the story of my life?

Purging the emotions in Greek tragedy was known as ‘catharsis’. It is followed by a feeling of relief. Steps Four and Five are cathartic because by identifying and sharing our character defects, we are able to let them go. But life doesn’t have to be all about dramatic catharsis. Zen for example, is a way of meditation that lets go of feelings through gentle meditation – a sort of catharsis without the drama. Some of us prefer it that way. Today I ask God for a life without too much negative drama, whatever the possible benefits.

Today I Will………………………………………………………………………………..

Daily Reading from Recovery Days April 30th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – close eyes briefly

HALT

In April, we looked at courage, honesty, integrity, giving, helping others and the joy of recovery. These positive attributes do not just appear, we must work for them, and we must ask for help. Our main motivation at first is fear – addiction will kill us unless we take positive action. Soon other motivations appear, to keep us on the right path: we don’t want to disappoint our friends who offered the hand of friendship, we don’t want to lose the new happiness we are starting to feel, and we do want to be true to our Higher Power. Later on, the siren call of our old addiction will become so tiny that we don’t notice it at all but for now, there is still work to be done. There are no holidays from recovery. Do I understand that recovery is for life – that, however good I am feeling, I must remain vigilant?

HALT (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired) are the four things to avoid in early recovery. We could find ourselves in any (or all) of those states at any time. If we do, what should be our response? We should have a plan to deal with it – a person to call or a meeting to attend. Our great good fortune is that we are members of a worldwide support system. We must ask for help, so that we see how to help others, when the time comes. Today I remind myself to ask for help when I feel the need.

Today I Will……………………………………………

Daily Reading from Recovery Days April 28th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – review expectations

Denial

When you decide to quit addictive behaviour and face up to reality, you are essentially casting off your denial – the twisted mental process that allowed you to continue your addiction for so long although you knew it was wrong. Sobering up means accepting three essential truths:

  • This is what your behaviour was like
  • This is how it makes others think about you
  • This is how it makes you feel about yourself.

Facing reality can be painful – nobody likes hearing other people’s criticism, however justified. The thing that gives us encouragement is that we have a plan for putting things right – the Twelve Step programme. With this plan and the help of our Higher Power, reality does not seem so painful.

The moment we decide to sober up is a hugely important milestone. The road ahead may be arduous, but we have a roadmap and a guide. All that is left to do is to make the first move. Today I thank God for giving me the necessities for my recovery journey.

Today I Will