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* April 5 *

Remember Mindfulness – review expectations

Step Four

Step Four involves us in taking a thorough and searching personal inventory. An important aspect of this Step is to examine our personal value system – what we respect, hold precious and protect. This goes to the heart of our beliefs, especially our view of ourselves and our view of the world. Our own values dictate how we interact with others. Do we respect them, disdain them, or feel the need to rescue them? We would do well to remember that we are not responsible for other people and to ask ourselves honestly: do I protect what I value, and do I respect what others value?

Sometimes it is hard to recognise that a problem is not mine and refuse accordingly to take on the difficulties of others. Being a compulsive helper does not resolve the other person’s fundamental problem because they need to take responsibility for their own lives. I can only change myself, and that should be work enough. There are many paradoxes in recovery: surrender in order to win is one, and another is that recovery is about making connections but also about setting proper boundaries.

I ask today to know the difference between when to protect and when to respect.

Today I Will………………………………………………………