Category Archives: Living skills

Daily Reading from Recovery Days April 20th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – enjoy the moment

Step Four

This is me and what I have done. Step Four can be described in this way. It is also known as the Step of courage. Addicts are subject to the same emotional upheavals as everyone else – we just haven’t handled them too well in the past. Chapter Ten of the Big Book talks about this: The greatest enemies of us alcoholics are resentment, jealousy, anger, and fear. Courage comes in facing this fact, asking for help, deciding to take action and dealing with life’s daily challenges in a new, open and direct manner. Step Four starts the process, where we reveal how it is that we are the problem, nobody else is to blame. Do I accept that I am the problem and nobody else?

A person who has had much experience of hardships and pain is likely to be able to meet challenges better than a person for whom life has always been easy. Sometimes our past suffering can be our greatest strength. But we must not minimise it. In recovery, I must never forget the pain and suffering I caused because I never want to repeat the experience. Today I ask God to help me always to remember the bad times in my life so that I never repeat them.

Today I Will……………………………………………………………………..

Daily Reading from Recovery Days April 19th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – review expectations

Power of example

The story of the Good Samaritan in the Bible is a story of courage, compassion, and hope. It takes courage to recognise injustice, to take a different view from others and most of all, to act when others do not. What motivated this brave person? It can’t have been a selfish desire for fame, although he is famous

– we do not even know his name. All his actions were of giving. This totally unselfish and anonymous act of kindness has affected more people over the centuries than other gifts in history though some involved great generosity too. The power of example could not be better demonstrated. Do I understand the power of example, so that I can be an example to others?

The great Christian theologian St Augustine said: Hope has two beautiful daughters; their names are Anger and Courage. Anger at the way things are and Courage to see that they do not remain as they are. Righteous anger is a strong motivator if properly controlled. Courage to stand out and behave differently from the crowd is a special kind of courage. When the crowd is against you, they show a very negative power of example that requires a special kind of help to overcome – Higher Power. Today I ask God for courage when I need to take a stand for what is right.

Today I Will

Daily Reading from Recovery Days April 18th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – relax your whole body gradually

Self-improvement

When we think about self-improvement, it’s difficult not to recall Lisa Simpson saying: It’s a long, arduous journey of personal and spiritual discovery. Very few of us are fine the way we are and some of us know it. The paradox is that we have to first accept ourselves the way we are before we can make any changes. Self- improvement is a very legitimate goal for most of us. The Twelve Steps are all about it. If you think that you can achieve happy sobriety without doing any work on yourself, perhaps by taking some ‘miracle pill’, then by all means try. But for those of us who struggle with dishonesty, selfishness, self-pity, and other character defects, it may not work. Do I have a realistic view of myself?

I must try not to take myself too seriously. Addiction is a life-or-death disease, but it can be successfully managed. Normal life is not all about doom and gloom. We use comedy to get perspective and sometimes to help us accept difficult truths. I must keep an open mind always and remind myself that often laughter is the best medicine. Today I ask God to preserve my sense of humour so that I may improve my insight into life’s problems.

Today I Will……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Daily Reading from Recovery Days April 17th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – Breathe calmly

Helping others

Richmond W, author of the inspirational AA meditation book Twenty-four Hours A Day, also wrote poetry. His lines on helping others from his poem Not Enough run as follows:

To hear is not enough…

…I must give wherever need appears And learn to live unselfishly.   R.Walker

Richmond was as good as his words and is said to have helped hundreds of struggling addicted people during his years of sobriety. A man of true integrity and a shining example to us all. Am I ready to help others in need, without hesitation?

If you want happiness for a day, go fishing. If you want happiness for a lifetime, help somebody.

Chinese proverb.

Altruism is pleasurable, it builds connections that benefit both giver and receiver. When we look beyond ourselves, we see that we are not alone, and we realise the limitations of staying within our selfish comfort zone. If I help others, I help myself. Today I ask for the courage and insight to be proactive in helping people in need.

Today I Will…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Daily Reading from Recovery Days April 16th by Chris B

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On this day in 1879, St Bernadette of Lourdes died, aged 35

Courage

Courage is found in unlikely places. St Bernadette of Lourdes suffered pain from tuberculosis for most of her short life. She also endured harsh treatment as a child brought up in poverty. Her miraculous visions at Lourdes were not believed at first, but she was steadfast and brave when people ridiculed her. She said that great suffering and great love are connected and give meaning to life. She never ceased to be grateful and humble and spent her last years as a nun helping others. She displayed all the qualities that recovering addicted people need. Do I recognise the need for love, courage, gratitude, humility and helping others?

If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to pick one of those pieces up and begin again. That’s the beauty of being alive. We can always start all over again and enjoy God’s amazing opportunities bestowed on us. Have faith in him always.

St Bernadette.

Today I ask God that I may live according to the example of St Bernadette.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days April 15th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – close eyes briefly

Unity

For a Twelve Step group to be successful, there are said to be six essentials:

  • Fellowship
  • Faith in a Higher Power
  • Service
  • Welcome
  • Humility
  • Gratitude.

Where a group’s members can regularly demonstrate all these things, the group is likely to thrive and the outcome for newcomers will be good. Am I ready to make every effort to ensure the success of my group?

Learning to live unselfishly takes practice. The need to keep my addiction active turned me into a highly selfish person. Only a conscious effort to do things differently, on a daily basis, will enable me to change. I need help from my Higher Power. Reading some of the stories of unselfishness and helping others, either in the lives of the founding fathers of AA and NA or in the lives of the Saints, gives me daily inspiration. Today I ask to be freed from the bondage of my selfishness.

Today I Will………………………………………………………………………………….

Daily Reading from Recovery Days April 14th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – send positive thoughts

Fellowship and connection

We few, we happy few, we band of brothers; for he today who sheds his blood with me shall be my brother.

Shakespeare, King Henry V.

Whether we have actually shed blood or not, all of us addicted people have been in a fight and this common experience gives us a strong sense of fellowship and a sense of purpose too. Brotherhood and sisterhood are great words that bring us a sense of connection and togetherness at a crucial time in our lives. For most people, doing something as part of a group or team gives more satisfaction than doing it alone. Am I glad of the feeling of team spirit and involvement that I get from belonging to a Twelve Step group?

Attending a fellowship meeting and sitting alone at the back of the room, we can observe the other members and we can learn from their words of wisdom, but do we feel comfortable? If we feel welcome and if we interact with others, it is likely that we will enjoy the meeting more and leave with a warm feeling of having been a part of something, rather than having been just a spectator. Others, perhaps with more experience, have a responsibility to extend the hand of friendship but we have a responsibility to ourselves to make an effort to connect. Today I ask God for the courage to make the extra effort needed to come out of my isolation and meet new people.

Today I Will…………………………………………………………………………………

Daily Reading from Recovery Days April 13th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – relax your whole body gradually

Responsibility

Responsibility has several meanings – duty, care, protection, control and blame. For us, it is a positive word meaning positive action. People in recovery are among the most responsible people you can find, because they know from bitter experience the negative consequences of irresponsible behaviour. Am I ready to act responsibly today?

When I show responsibility by extending the helping hand of fellowship to a struggling person, I am also showing gratitude, compassion, empathy, humility, and the power of example. Doing this is a form of prayer:

Inasmuch as you have done unto the least of these my brethren, you have done it unto me.

St Matthew.

No wonder then, that doing so makes me feel good. Today I will remember the words of St Paul in his letter to the Corinthians: Three things will last forever: faith, hope and love, and the greatest of these is love.

Today I Will……………………………………………………………….

Daily Reading from Recovery Days April 12th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – sit comfortably

Honesty and integrity

Honesty and integrity are important in any walk of life. People need to believe that what they see is what they get, and that there is no disconnect between what is said and what is done. Relationships then become rewarding and meaningful. Living a life of integrity includes doing the following:

  • Keeping your word, delivering on promises
  • Keeping commitments in actions and appointments
  • Keeping yourself and surroundings neat and clean
  • Staying focused on a task up to completion
  • Keeping honest company – we are judged by our friends
  • Taking responsibility for actions and mistakes
  • Showing respect and concern for others.

Am I living a life of honesty and integrity?

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

St Paul – Philippians.

I ask God for integrity in all my affairs today.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days April 11th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – enjoy the moment

Higher Power

How do I find the strength to quit? This is usually the first question that newcomers to the Twelve Steps ask. They see happy sober people, but they can’t understand the process. How did you get like that, what’s the secret? They then ask. As many of those in the fellowships know, there are four sources of strength:

  • The fellowships – their support and example
  • The sharing of experiences
  • The belief in help from a Higher Power
  • Working with other addicted people.

The strength from these combined sources is more powerful than addiction itself. It can be felt in the meeting rooms. It is the power that always makes us feel better at the end of a meeting than we did at the start. It is Higher Power indeed.

It is not enough to know the power of fellowship, sharing, belief and passing the message. If I do not act upon my knowledge, it is all pointless. It is not the intention of my Higher Power that I should be the only person to benefit. If I do not pass on the message, I may lose the power. Today I ask God that I never cease in my mission to carry the message to other struggling addicted people.