Tag Archives: daily reflections

Daily Reading from Recovery Days June 21st by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – close eyes briefly

Empathy

A person with a big ego will struggle to find the
empathy needed to offer true kindness. Addicted
people are sick people, not bad people. They
deserve to be treated the same as anyone in need of
health care. When the day comes that they ask for
help, it is important that they receive a good
response. Most people in recovery never forget the
welcome and the kindness that they received at their
first meeting. The memory remains, because people
remember how they felt at times of great stress. Will
I show kindness and empathy when I offer help to
an addicted person?

The first stages of recovery are a time of great
vulnerability. Is is a common experience that unites
us in fellowship. The kindness and support that we
all receive is a precious thing that we must keep
alive by passing it on like an Olympic torch. In
doing so, we are passing on our power – Higher
Power. Today I ask God that I will always pass on
what I receive.
……………………………………………………….

Daily Reading from Recovery Days June 19th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – review expectations


Keep it simple

For many people, the words: I did this – it worked,
are more compelling than: Do this – it will work.
The Twelve Steps don’t instruct, they merely
suggest that we do the things that worked for others.
They do not claim that theirs is the only path to
sobriety. We tend to question direct orders, whereas
the example of another is difficult to deny. The
Twelve Steps are known as a simple programme for
complicated people. The slogan ‘Keep it Simple’ is
not just something to hang on the wall but
something we should carry around in our hearts
and minds wherever we go. Am I keeping things
simple?


It is usually my ego that leads me to question things.
Of course, some actions and some statements need
to be questioned. Perhaps I should check if I am
suitably qualified, before I raise my hand. Do I
know better what is good for me, than people with
years of sobriety? My track record seems to indicate
otherwise. There is sense in the old timers’ advice to
take the cotton wool out of my ears and put it in my
mouth. I ask God today to give me the common
sense to listen to advice instead of questioning.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days June 17th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – close eyes briefly

Kindness

Kindness and compassion are important factors for
people with addiction problems. The word
‘kindness’ originates from the old English word
‘kin’ for ‘family’ and ‘connection’. Showing
kindness to another is sharing their trouble and
pain, as we would do in any relationship we care
about. Kindness is consideration and respect, not
only to others but to ourselves. Am I ready today to
show kindness to anyone that I see in need?

Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.
The Dalai Lama.
Kindness is what binds a healthy society together. It
should never be given selectively; it should be
shared amongst everyone. I cannot expect to receive
kindness from strangers if I am not prepared to
show kindness myself. When I work the Steps and
have some experience of sober living, it is then my
responsibility to extend the hand of friendship and
kindness to others. That is what is meant by Step
Twelve. Today I ask to be ready to extend the hand
of friendship and kindness to anyone in need.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days June 14th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – review expectations


Behavioural addiction

Gambling, gaming, shopping, pornography and
workaholism are examples of behavioural addictions
that are on the increase. A few years ago, these
activities would have been mostly performed in
public. Today, thanks to the home computer and the
mobile phone they are largely unobserved, mostly
happening ‘behind lace curtains’. There is a danger
for people in recovery that one addiction can replace
another or lead a person back to their original
addiction because activities are linked.
Gambling and drinking is one example of this. Am
I aware of the dangers of cross addiction
and the need to stop all addictive behaviour?

Addiction never gives up. Complacency leads to
disaster. The alcoholic who thinks that an
occasional joint won’t matter, or a gambler who
sees no problem with a few drinks, are both
playing with fire. I cannot fully embrace a new life
of sobriety if I am still experiencing the
escapism of even a small amount of addictive
behaviour. Today I give thanks for my sobriety
but remind myself of the dangers in any kind of
addictive behaviour.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days June 12th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – relax your whole body gradually


Humour

American writer Kurt Vonnegut said that we should
stop being so serious: Jokes help a lot. And get a
dog, if you don’t already have one. Vonnegut
certainly knew a thing or two about recovery from
difficult situations – he survived the Dresden firebombing
during WWII because he was locked up
as a prisoner inside an insulated slaughterhouse. As
a professed ‘Christ-loving atheist’, his view of life
was to help each other as much as possible. Can I
keep an open mind and not take myself too
seriously?

There is not much to laugh about in the aftermath of
addiction, but in our grimmest moments we
sometimes turn to dark comedy, because horror and
humour are often two sides of the same coin. It is a
bizarre experience to recount one’s appalling secrets
to AA members who react with a nod of empathy
instead of a shriek of dismay. But how else should
we react to life’s great challenges? Absurdist
philosopher Albert Camus’ response was said to be:
Should I kill myself or have a cup of coffee? I’ll settle
for the coffee. Today I will take recovery seriously,
but not overlook humour.

Daily reading from Recovery Days June 10th by Chris B

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Step Six

Step Six is part of removing what doesn’t work for
us, to make room for new attitudes and ideas. It
follows on from Steps Four and Five where we
identify the defects we need to get rid of. It may all
sound quite neat but in reality, we are often reluctant
to remove bad habits. The softer, easier way may not
have worked but ‘softer and easier’ was a comfort
zone – it was a coping mechanism, albeit a
maladaptive one. We turn to our Higher Power at
this important moment because there must be no
compromises and we need guidance. Am I entirely
ready to go through with Step Six?

The French writer and critic Charles du Bos said:
The important thing is this: to be able, at any
moment, to sacrifice what we are for what we could
become. His use of the word ‘sacrifice’ is important
here, because it recognises how difficult it can be to
give up our old ways. To use another phrase that du
Bos would have recognised, ‘nostalgie de la
boue’ (the attraction of degradation) is hard to
remove. It is a process that may take time, but it will
be time well spent – another new experience for
some of us. Today I ask God for guidance as I work
to remove all my shortcomings.

Daily reading from Recovery Days June 11th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – enjoy the moment

Head to heart

Addiction professionals talk about the eighteen-inch
journey, from head to heart. What we think and what
we feel can be very different but the more the two
can be connected, the more we will be in balance.
Some of us know from personal experience that
intellectual understanding of an event and its
consequences is often not sufficient to convince us
to do otherwise. That is true of addiction. Because
our emotions are so powerful, it takes more than
logical argument to persuade us to do what we are
too afraid, too arrogant or too ashamed to attempt.
Will I make the eighteen-inch journey?

When the great seventeenth century thinker Blaise
Pascal said: The heart has its reasons, which reason
knows nothing of, he meant that the heart can
sometimes stop us doing what seems intellectually,
right or equally, do things that seem logically
wrong. Today I ask for the wisdom to make the
eighteen-inch journey in order to keep my head and
my heart in balance.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days June 9th by Chris B

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Fake it to make it

Remember Mindfulness – close eyes briefly


Despite being anonymous, they all seemed
to understand and like each other very well.
That was my first impression of an AA
meeting. So, I kept going to meetings
because, I knew I had to. There were no
other options. Sometimes I was glad to go,
sometimes I pretended to be glad. An oldtimer
said: ‘fake it to make it’. Perhaps I
was doing that. In any case, a miracle was
happening because I was not drinking. I
thought that I had better keep on doing
the same thing, because it worked. I still
regularly go to that meeting. It has saved
my life. Anon.
Am I committed to attending meetings because I
know that I cannot be complacent about my
disease of addiction?


I do not need to understand the reasons why
something works before I do it. Just the fact that it
does work should be enough. I will apply the same
principle to the Twelve Step fellowships. I am
content to follow them and keep it simple. Today I
give thanks for the simple gifts that I have received.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days June 8th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – review expectations

Enough


So many of our problems are caused by wanting.
Part of this comes from our raised expectations. In
the West, capitalism is based on the idea of
consumerism and economic growth. Many of us
have far more than we need. It is hard in such a
climate to simply make do with enough, and
altruism often does not seem strong enough in the
face of glossy advertisements and celebrity-led
videos. Elsewhere in the world, people struggle to
put food on the table, if they have a table at all.
Twelve Steps are partly an example of unselfish
living. Do I remember that by following their
principles I may be seen as an example to others?

Two men were talking at a conference. One said:
Tom, how does it make you feel to know that
man over there made more money today than
you will make in all your life? Tom said: I feel
happy, because I’ve got something he can never
have – the knowledge that I’ve got enough.
Anon.
When you realise that you have all you need,
then you can look at the world in a different way.
Today I give thanks for all that I have and ask
nothing more.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days June 7th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – close eyes briefly

Asking for help

What is the point of reality, if you are not wanting to
live responsibly? Whether consciously or
unconsciously, this is the mindset of many addicted
people. When the real world is such a frightening
place, you might just as well be on the moon.
Unfortunately, the moon does not sustain life for
long and sooner or later, we have to come down to
earth. Our re-entry can be painful, some do not
make it. We will need help. Coming to our senses is
easier than learning to act sensibly. Acquiring good
habits takes time and application. Will I ask for
help?

In the Bible, the prodigal son spends his inheritance
on dissipation and riotous living, then ‘comes to
himself, realises his mistakes and returns home to
be welcomed by his father. Coming to myself means
living according to my better nature after years of
not doing so. The tale of the prodigal son is a
wonderful example of the goodness of human
nature. If I am to receive forgiveness, I need to show
honesty, humility and willingness to change, just
like the prodigal son in the Bible. Today I ask not to
forget that forgiveness puts a responsibility on me to do my best in return.