Tag Archives: Addiction treatment

Daily Reading form Recovery Days January 28th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – relax your body

Boundaries

We in recovery are fortunate that we can know, understand, and love each other at such a meaningful level. This does not mean that we should not have regard to proper boundaries and an understanding of the limits of our responsibilities. The Twelve Step fellowships give us constant guidance. Several of the Steps are to do with boundaries: Step Four and Ten, deal with personal inventory and Steps Eight and Nine deal with the consequences where we have ignored boundaries in the past. Am I using the Twelve Steps to help me maintain healthy boundaries?


The Twelve Step fellowships bring us the welcome feeling of once more belonging. In essence, we are learning in recovery the lesson that love that is freely given comes with responsibilities and must be treated with respect. Peace of mind is a worthy outcome when we are prepared to go to any lengths to achieve sobriety, but it must include respect to others. Please God may I always remember that the gifts of love and friendship bring with them responsibilities as well.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 27th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – sit comfortably


Maintenance

When I seek to build my life around my recovery, I
am setting myself the task of learning a new habit.
This is especially important in early recovery. I must
check my thoughts, feelings, and actions daily to
make sure that all I set out to do is based on the
premise that I have a disease that can kill me. After
several weeks of self-appraisal, I may feel able to
relax a bit, because new habits are forming. Yet,
addiction is a disease that never gives up. It keeps
trying to return. The remedy is constant vigilance
and that means attending meetings regularly to
receive a reality check. Do I understand that my
sobriety depends upon constant vigilance?


A life of happy recovery is such a precious thing that
I must never take it for granted. It does not require
very much effort to simply ask myself: What can I do
today for my recovery? If I had just undergone major
surgery, I would not hesitate. Once again, my ego is
trying to push me into attitudes that are dangerous
for sobriety. I must remind myself that:
Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the
earth. New Testament, St Matthew.
Today I ask God for the humility to counter my ego.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 25th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – review expectations

Boundaries

Boundaries exist in three main forms –

  • Physical: you won’t be physically pushed around
  • Emotional: you won’t be insulted or humiliated
  • Mental: you won’t be unduly affected mentally.

  • Taking back control in these three areas can be
    difficult. In extreme cases, where there has been
    systematic abuse, professional help may be needed,
    and we should not be ashamed of asking for help. It
    is not uncommon for people in addiction to have
    been subjected to psychological bullying. Have I
    decided that enough is enough, that it is time to
    establish healthy boundaries?

  • When I have healthy boundaries, I will be calmer,
    stronger, and happier. I will have self-respect, a
    sense of identity and meaningful relationships. I will
    be able to say yes or no, without guilt, anger, or fear.
    The help in doing this comes from my Higher
    Power, which works through other people – my
    friends in sobriety whose experience, strength and
    hope will see me through. Today I ask my God to
    stay beside me, as I practice setting healthy
    boundaries and learn from the example and
    experience of my friends in sobriety.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 24th by Chris B

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On this day in 1971, AA co-founder Bill Wilson died

Respect

The Gestalt Prayer, written by the psychiatrist Fritz
Perls, tells us that we are not in this world to live up
to anyone’s expectations except our own. Trying to
live the way other people would like us to simply
leads to unhappiness. Healthy boundaries are about
respecting ourselves and others. They also allow us to
understand who we are and what we need.
Boundaries become important when we come under
threat, so it is best to establish them before they are
actually needed. It is very difficult to apply
boundaries when someone is already trying to
manipulate you. Will I review my boundaries before
they are needed, to ensure that they are strong and
fit for purpose?


If I am to live according to high moral principles, I
must identify what I really need and value. In the
past, such things as success or wealth might have
been my focus but now, I must reconsider. If for
example, I feel that peace of mind is more important
than a stressful job, I must have boundaries to ensure
that my ego does not lead me to take on too much
in the workplace. ‘Principles before Personalities’ is
a slogan that includes my own personality. Today I
ask God for the wisdom to keep my expectations
low and my hopes high.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 23rd by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – close your eyes


Boundaries

Poor boundaries are often found in people with
addiction problems. Quite simply, in active
addiction we are prepared to compromise with our
relationships, our self-respect, our health and pretty
much everything, in order to keep our addiction
going. By doing so, we will open ourselves to all
kinds of manipulation, abuse, co-dependence, and
criminality. A chaotic lifestyle seems almost normal.
Setting new and firmer boundaries is an important
element of the positive action that we commit
ourselves to in recovery. Do I understand the need to
establish new and stronger boundaries?

Our new personality develops through the
establishment of regular habits. We can start in a
small way, perhaps teaching ourselves to say ‘no’
when we need to, on relatively minor issues. But we
must have the willingness to practice these new
principles in all our affairs. What begins as a step
into the unknown can quickly become a regular and
beneficial habit if we are prepared to trust in the
help of our Higher Power. Today I ask to be
unafraid as I set myself to the task of building selfrespect
through healthy boundaries.

Remember Mindfulness – close your eyes


Boundaries

Poor boundaries are often found in people with
addiction problems. Quite simply, in active
addiction we are prepared to compromise with our
relationships, our self-respect, our health and pretty
much everything, in order to keep our addiction
going. By doing so, we will open ourselves to all
kinds of manipulation, abuse, co-dependence, and
criminality. A chaotic lifestyle seems almost normal.
Setting new and firmer boundaries is an important
element of the positive action that we commit
ourselves to in recovery. Do I understand the need to
establish new and stronger boundaries?


Our new personality develops through the
establishment of regular habits. We can start in a
small way, perhaps teaching ourselves to say ‘no’
when we need to, on relatively minor issues. But we
must have the willingness to practice these new
principles in all our affairs. What begins as a step
into the unknown can quickly become a regular and
beneficial habit if we are prepared to trust in the
help of our Higher Power. Today I ask to be
unafraid as I set myself to the task of building selfrespect
through healthy boundaries.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 21st by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – relax your body

Fellowship


The Twelve Steps begin with the word ‘we’.
Fellowship is all about that. It is actually quite hard
to attend a fellowship meeting and not interact with
anyone, because so much of our principles and
traditions are concerned with the concept of ‘we’ –
that is, togetherness. The hand of friendship is
always extended. The group is more powerful than
the individual. Yet no member can compel, punish,
or expel anyone. Many times, we hear outsiders
exclaim I wish I belonged to that group of yours. Am
I grateful to belong to one of the Twelve Step
fellowships?

adversity creates the strongest of bonds, as
anyone who has been in the army, or a boarding
school will confirm. Being part of a football team is
totally different from being a spectator. The
intensity of the team spirit produces results, and the
same happens in recovery. We are truly blessed to
have not just our sobriety, but a worldwide support
system that is freely ours for the taking. All we have
to do is turn up. Today I pray for the sobriety, wellbeing
and happiness of the band of brothers and
sisters with whom I am proud to belong.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 20th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – sit comfortably


Spiritual principles

Wear the world like a loose garment,
which touches us in a few places and there
lightly. St Francis of Assisi.
When I truly belong in the world, I can move
through it with confidence, knowing that my
thoughts and emotions will not be ravaged by life’s
stresses and strains. If I can be ‘in the world but not
of it’ then I can live by spiritual principles that I
know to be right rather than subjecting myself to all
the ways of the world with its many negative
influences. Am I ready to live by principles that I
know to be right?

To be in the world but not of it, is to be like a boat
that floats on the water without sinking, even when
there are storms. But this can be hard at times and
even harder when we try to do it alone. One of our
most powerful resources is a role model, a person
who we see struggling with problems similar to ours
and overcoming them. If they can do it, so can I.
Today I pray that I may seek the company of others
and learn from them to trust and share.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 19th by Chris B

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This day in 1960 the first meeting of Overeaters Anonymous held

Eating disorders

Overeaters Anonymous (OA) is a community of
people who support each other in order to recover
from compulsive eating and food behaviours.
Everyone who feels they have a problem with food is
welcome. The first meeting was held in Los Angeles.
Today, over six thousand groups meet weekly
throughout the world. It is believed that around
sixty thousand members are finding help to start
new lives in recovery. Am I grateful that the
message of the Twelve Steps is being brought to
people with addictions of all kinds?

The idea of a fellowship for people with eating
disorders was conceived at a meeting of Gamblers
Anonymous. This illustrates the variety of addictions
there are, and their commonality. Eating disorders
seem to be a fairly recent problem in terms of
numbers afflicted though the problem itself may go
back hundreds of years. Addiction does not confine
itself to one particular behaviour and I must always
be aware of the dangers of cross-addiction. I ask
today for the grace to extend the hand of friendship
to all Twelve Step fellowships.

Daily Reading from Recovery days January 17th by Chris B

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On this day in 1919 Prohibition became law in U SA


Comfort zones

I wouldn’t want to join a club that would have me as a
member is more than just a funny quip from Groucho
Marx. It also sounds like the sad cry of a
person stuck in self-pity and self-dislike. That’s
probably why it resonates with many who
struggle with addiction. Recovery is about
coming out of our comfort zones, something
many desperate people are reluctant to do,
because their familiar unhappiness is less
challenging than the idea of change. Even if we
have problems with our self-image, we should dig
deep to risk doing something new. Am I ready to
come out of my comfort zone?


Today I reflect on the difference between being a fully
established member of a team or club, and being an
outsider, a mere spectator. To feel myself part of a team
is inspiring. I recognise the example we give. We will
not let each other down. To the spectator, our band
of brothers is enviable. When I was a spectator, I
knew I was missing something, but I didn’t know
how to get it. I should have asked, but my denial
held me back. Today, I know better. Today I
give thanks for a fellowship that welcomes me as
a member.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 15th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – relax your body

Belonging

One of the major requirements for a contented life is
said to be a sense of belonging. The desire to belong
is a human need that goes back to the earliest tribes
in history. The opposite state – isolation – is for
many people almost unbearable. Yet, being
surrounded by other human beings doesn’t
guarantee a sense of belonging. For that, we need
identification and interaction too. So, if you attend
an AA meeting, but you secretly think you are
somehow different, you are unlikely to identify with
people there and will feel an outsider, however
crowded the room. Am I ready to look for
similarities in others, rather than differences?

How very much alike all of us
alcoholics are, when we admit that
the chips are finally down. Bill W.
All of us in recovery are travelling the same road. No
wonder we feel a strong sense of kinship and
understanding. But to experience this to the full, we
must share our experiences with complete candour.
Steps Four and Five help us. Today I ask for the
courage to share my character defects openly and
honestly so that I allow others to identify with me.