Category Archives: Living skills

Daily Reading from Recovery Days October 19th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – close eyes briefly


Slips


In Twelve Step circles, they say a slip happens
when ‘Sobriety Lost Its Priority’. A slip of any
kind is a relapse and must be taken seriously.
Looking at our thoughts and behaviour before
the slip happened can give us insights into what
needs putting right. Had we cut down on
meetings? Were we harbouring resentments? We
must not minimise what has happened. Going
to a meeting and telling our story may require
courage but we will find strength in doing so
and nobody will judge us. Addiction is a disease
that is characterised by relapse and the best
solution is to get back into the programme as
soon as possible. Do I fully understand how slips
can happen?


If I go to my home group and share about my
relapse, I may help others as well as myself. When a
person speaks about their relapse, I will feel
great empathy and a desire to help. Today I am
grateful to belong to a fellowship where mistakes
that are honestly shared are treated with compassion
and understanding.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days October 18th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – relax your body from head to toes


But for the grace of God


Many of us can thank the Twelve Steps for lasting
and contented sobriety, but they are not the only
way. They are not always successful either.
Thinking of this, we feel grateful that we ourselves
have been able to hear and successfully apply the
message to our daily lives. Some of us consider this
a miracle, especially when we consider our past
behaviour and attitudes. Am I grateful for the
miracle of sobriety?

I should give thought to those still struggling with
addiction, with whom I feel great empathy. I must
never take my recovery for granted. I have failed
myself in the past and there have been many false
starts and disappointments. I must do all I can to
help those who are still struggling. Not only must I
be an example to others, but I must also reach out
in friendship whenever anyone asks for help. Today
I understand that gratitude is more meaningful
when it is linked to action.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days October 17th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – send positive thoughts


Word power


Words can lead us into new ways of thinking.
Advertising copywriters say that, among the most
powerful words in the English language are: You,
Imagine, Now, Because, and Believe.

These are said
the be the words that influence us the most – we can
view them as follows:

  • You: focus for empathy
  • Imagine: the start of hope
  • Now: the call to action
  • Because: the gateway to understanding
  • Believe: achieve the impossible.

Perhaps what works for copywriters works for those
recovering from addiction. Try combining them in a
sentence such as: You are stronger than you
imagine and you can decide now to change your
life, because if you believe in yourself, you can do
anything. Feel the power of that! Sometimes,
looking at ourselves from a different perspective
gives us new insights. Am I keeping an open mind?
Every day in recovery is an opportunity to explore
new ideas of spirituality and creativity. I give thanks
for the power of words, correctly used.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days October 16th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – review expectations


Easy does it


Few people foresee happiness in the act of
surrender, yet that is what will happen for us, if we
take that first step. Yet we should not try too hard.
‘Easy does it’ as they say in AA. Trying too hard, like
perfectionism can be self-defeating. Indeed, they
can be a sign that our acceptance is perhaps not as
wholehearted as we imagine. Far better to progress
at a steady pace and hand the process over to our
Higher Power. Am I aware of the dangers of trying
too hard?


Instead of driving ourselves to extremes of
thoroughness while doing the Steps, we could try
looking outside ourselves and helping others. There
are so many ways of doing this – service in
fellowships, taking the message to those struggling
with addiction, pulling one’s weight in the family, or
extending the hand of friendship to complete
strangers who may be in difficulties. All these
actions benefit both giver and receiver, but they also
can serve as profound examples to others of positive
affirmative action. I ask that today I will do my best
and that every choice I make will be the right one.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days October 15th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – Listen to the silence

Unity


Unity is the bedrock of personal recovery. The
founders of Alcoholics Anonymous appreciated this
quite early on. If we cannot recover together in
unity, then our whole fellowship – its structure and
its members – will melt away, leaving us without
support of any kind. We may become too weak to
survive on our own. Your fellowship needs you! I
have a responsibility to support the organisation
that has given me so much. The idea that: I can’t
but we can is not unique to Twelve Step Fellowships
but is nevertheless true. Am I aware of the
importance of unity?


A Twelve Step fellowship is democracy in action
(though it has been described as ‘high-functioning
anarchy’). We act together, not as individuals. That
means there is no leader, no one person in charge
who makes rules or decisions on our behalf. Nobody
has the right to ban us or stifle dissent and everyone
may have their own views. Hierarchies and rules
lead to punishments, resentments and disunity.
Responsibility, unselfishness and love bind us
together. For that, I give thanks.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days October 14th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – Breathe Deeply

Service


In the fellowships, what is meant by Service? We are
a large group of people from very different
backgrounds with a common purpose, and our goal
is happy sobriety through spiritual growth. Yet, for
many of us, the programme is unexplored territory.
We may have admitted our powerlessness and
unmanageability and asked for help and then taken
it no further. Each person is free to follow their own
path without criticism of any kind, but there is so
much more to recovery than just sobriety. Doing
service involves spreading the message and helping
others to progress. But, in the process, we help
ourselves to grow spiritually. Am I ready to do
service?


Secretary, treasurer, greeter and teamaker are some
of the more visible roles that are undertaken when
we do service. But the act of attending a meeting
where we talk to newcomers and support
colleagues is itself a form of service, as is our
example on a daily basis of following the Twelve
Steps to the best of our ability. I am ready to do my
part in giving service.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days October 13th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – enjoy the moment


Step Ten


Am I regularly checking that I am heading in the
right direction? This Step highlights the fact that
recovery is for life and the Twelve Steps are not just
to be ‘done’ and then forgotten. The fact is that
addiction is never finished with us and therefore we
must never relax and call ourselves cured. Regular
maintenance and vigilance are required. We now
have purpose and structure back in our lives to help
us so that it becomes a habit.. Am I keeping my
recovery strong through regular maintenance?

I must keep a watch for the old enemies: dishonesty,
selfishness, resentments, and laziness. The best way
of making sure they don’t come back is to keep
following the programme because if I interact with
the right people, any emerging character defect will
be highlighted in contrast to those following the
programme correctly. I must immerse myself in the
three legacies – Recovery, Unity and Service. I am grateful to be part of a Twelve Step fellowship.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days October 11th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – sit comfortably


Humour


Humour has many forms. The acts of smiling and laughing are good for us because they help the brain release feel-good chemicals. Humour is also relaxing and calms anxiety. Perhaps a sense of humour is the most important tool we have to help us learn life’s lessons. A chicken said to a pig: Isn’t it awesome that we both have a part in the great British breakfast of bacon and eggs? Yes, replied the pig, but you just contribute, while I make a full commitment. With humour we can learn and remember truths that change our attitudes. Am I ready to use humour to help my recovery?

Recovery is there to be enjoyed positively and shared laughter ha power as great as anything serious. The ancient Greeks gave tragedy and comedy equal status. Humour helps us see things in differently. The direst situations can appear more manageable with the injection of humour. Addiction is a serious business but humour can be one of the tools I use to achieve recovery. I wish to be ‘better than well’ and that certainly includes laughter. The Twelve Step fellowships provide friendship, kindness and humour and for these I am grateful.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days October 10th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – relax your body


Commitment


The Irish writer Brendan Behan was a committed Republican whose activities landed him in prison in the nineteen-forties. An alcoholic from an early age, Behan described himself as: ‘a drinker with a writing problem.’ He is remembered for his humour, once saying: I’ve joined Alcoholics Anonymous – I’m drinking under an assumed name. Sadly, he died aged forty-one, after collapsing in a Dublin pub. His life was gradually taken over by alcohol. He was unable to make a lasting commitment to sobriety. Addicted people can seem very lovable and amusing but, their lives often end in unhappiness and despair. Am I committed to sobriety?

Commitment means following a course of action even when it becomes hard, and you want to stop. This can be a challenge in early recovery because many of us have become used to giving up and running away from adversity and pain. Early sobriety and times when we crave our addiction of choice should be recognised. It is good to plan responses, such as people whose help may be asked and activities that will change our mindset. Today I ask for the courage to keep to my commitments.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days October 9th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – close eyes briefly


Personal values


We all have an internal value system which we refer to for decisions, perhaps subconsciously. It can be helpful to identify the values (there may be quite a few) and then pick the five that we consider the most important. These might be, for example: Honesty, Helping others, Openness, Determination and Humility. We can then ask ourselves if these are still our priorities – not everyone has the same. We can also look back at some of our recent decisions and consider whether we applied these values correctly; how did we respond, for example, when we saw a stranger in need of help? If we see room for improvement, we should make that happen. Do I review my value system?


When was the last time that I was really happy? When did I last feel justifiably proud of myself? Was it related to the values that I have and remain true to? If I had to explain my personal values to another person, could I do so with assurance because I feel they are right? Understanding my values and getting into the habit of referring back to them when I have important decisions to make, can lessen anxiety and increase my self-esteem. Today I ask for the will to keep working on self-improvement.