Tag Archives: daily reflections

Daily Reading from Recovery Days February 6th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – review expectations


Step Two

Step Two brings hope because it leads us to
understand that there is help available. Most people
who are trapped in the vicious circle of addiction
become very isolated, fearful, and desperate.
Addiction turns us insane, but this Step tells us
that we can be restored to sanity, with the help of
‘A Power Greater Than Ourselves’. The
emphasis is not on what this power is, but on
what it can do for us. But first, we must ask. Am I
ready to ask for help when I need to?
Ask, and it shall be given to you; seek, and
you shall find; knock, and it shall be
opened to you. St Matthew.

The words of the Christian Bible are echoed in the
words of the Twelve Step fellowships because they
deal with universal truths. Help is more readily
available than we imagine, yet few people have the
skill to look inside us to see our desperate needs. We
have to ask for it. Today I ask for the strength to
take that leap of faith and ask for help when I am in
difficulties.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days February 5th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – send positive thoughts

Re-connection


Addiction is many things but especially, it is an
attachment disorder. Humans are hardwired to need
love and connection to others but that seems to
happen less and less. The large family became the
small family and then quite often, the single parent
family. And physical interaction is being replaced by
online contact. The old saying: ‘It takes a village to
raise a child’ seems less meaningful these days.
Nobody really knows what impact gradual
disconnection has on emotional life, especially for
children. Addiction makes isolation worse. To
recover, we must reconnect. Am I ready to reconnect
to my fellow men and women?

Author Johann Hari concludes that the opposite of
addiction is not sobriety, but connection. He sees
addiction as a response to deep unhappiness
caused by disconnection between humans. I
can improve my wellbeing and sense of
belonging simply by working on existing
relationships and forming new ones. It is all part of
taking positive action. I ask God to grant me the
courage to improve my sense of connection and
offer the hand of friendship.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days February 2nd by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – breathe deeply

Change

For many of us, the idea of change is one that we
instinctively resist. Why change? We ask. And then
perhaps, how? Actually, ‘How’ is part of the answer
because it’s an acronym: Honesty, Openness and
Willingness to change are the three elements of
successful change, in therapy terms. People usually
think that they are willing to change but in reality,
most do not really want to. That ‘not wanting to
change’ bit is the firecracker that can burn the
house down if we give it the tiniest spark of
encouragement. Am I aware of the danger of not
wanting to change?

Change and growth are not the same. The former is
a concept, t h e latter is the process whereby
positive change becomes reality. Both are needed.
First, we commit to change and then we do the work
needed, over time, always remembering that change
can be reversed if we weaken in our commitment.
Today I will work to strengthen my commitment to
change by following the principles of the Twelve
Steps in all my affairs.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 31st by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – review expectations

Courage

We tend to think of courage in terms of a single
dramatic act as for example, when someone is
rescued from drowning. More common is the kind
of sustained courage that we need to make a
successful recovery. This requires forethought and
well-judged action. Courage like this is not an
impulse but an attitude. If we can develop a habit of
courage, so much the better. Am I ready to practice
an attitude of courage in all my affairs?

The kind of lasting courage that marks not a
moment, but a way of life means that the road ahead
may be rough at times. We are going to need help
and our best plan will be to stay close to our Higher
Power. John Bunyan, the great English writer and
preacher, likened life to a pilgrimage:
Who would true valour see, let him
come hither.
One here will constant be, come wind
come weather.
There’s no discouragement shall make
him once relent
His first avowed intent, to be a
pilgrim.
Today I ask God that I never be discouraged from
doing what I consider to be right.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 30th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – breathe deeply

Change

People of faith seldom lack courage. It’s usually a
quiet kind of courage that has its roots in self-regard
and love. When people talk about the courage to
change, they are usually implying a fear of some
kind, which is usually either of loss, of
independence, of commitment or of confrontation.
The fact is that when you commit yourself to
change, you are putting yourself on the spot because
you are raising expectations both in others and
yourself. When change happens, it is not always for
the good. The point is to make sure that the
benefits of your change far outweigh any possible
unwanted outcomes. Am I ready to make change
happen despite possible negative consequences?

If I change myself, not everybody may be pleased.
Perhaps some, for example my drinking friends,
prefer me the way I was. If so, I must remember all
the good reasons I have to change. This is a crucial
moment in my life where I call upon my Higher
Power to strengthen and lead me into that ‘arch of
experience wherethrough gleams the untravelled
world of happy sobriety’. God grant me the courage
to change the things I can.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 27th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – sit comfortably


Maintenance

When I seek to build my life around my recovery, I
am setting myself the task of learning a new habit.
This is especially important in early recovery. I must
check my thoughts, feelings, and actions daily to
make sure that all I set out to do is based on the
premise that I have a disease that can kill me. After
several weeks of self-appraisal, I may feel able to
relax a bit, because new habits are forming. Yet,
addiction is a disease that never gives up. It keeps
trying to return. The remedy is constant vigilance
and that means attending meetings regularly to
receive a reality check. Do I understand that my
sobriety depends upon constant vigilance?


A life of happy recovery is such a precious thing that
I must never take it for granted. It does not require
very much effort to simply ask myself: What can I do
today for my recovery? If I had just undergone major
surgery, I would not hesitate. Once again, my ego is
trying to push me into attitudes that are dangerous
for sobriety. I must remind myself that:
Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the
earth. New Testament, St Matthew.
Today I ask God for the humility to counter my ego.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 26th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – send positive thoughts

Boundaries

Most folks are as happy as they make up their mind
to be.
This Abraham Lincoln quote appears on the AA Just
For Today Card. If we want to be happy, we
certainly need to have self-respect, and this can only
come when we have strong and healthy boundaries.
Action is now required. Simply having the concept
of healthy boundaries is no good at all, we must
enforce them until the enforcement becomes a
habit. Otherwise, we will just be seen as ‘a person of
strong opinions, weakly held.’ And that is not far
from being a doormat. Am I now ready to practice
enforcing healthy boundaries?


Our boundaries have been established in the past
from a variety of sources – life events, other people’s
behaviour and how we feel about ourselves.
Sometimes our emotional wounds lead us to
compromise on boundaries. Thus, if we have
experienced childhood rejection, our fear of
abandonment may have led us to allow
manipulation in relationships where love is used as a
weapon, to be given or withdrawn at will. Do I see
this in myself? I ask for the wisdom to see where my
damaged emotions have led me to compromise on
boundaries. So, I may repair them.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 25th by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – review expectations

Boundaries

Boundaries exist in three main forms –

  • Physical: you won’t be physically pushed around
  • Emotional: you won’t be insulted or humiliated
  • Mental: you won’t be unduly affected mentally.

  • Taking back control in these three areas can be
    difficult. In extreme cases, where there has been
    systematic abuse, professional help may be needed,
    and we should not be ashamed of asking for help. It
    is not uncommon for people in addiction to have
    been subjected to psychological bullying. Have I
    decided that enough is enough, that it is time to
    establish healthy boundaries?

  • When I have healthy boundaries, I will be calmer,
    stronger, and happier. I will have self-respect, a
    sense of identity and meaningful relationships. I will
    be able to say yes or no, without guilt, anger, or fear.
    The help in doing this comes from my Higher
    Power, which works through other people – my
    friends in sobriety whose experience, strength and
    hope will see me through. Today I ask my God to
    stay beside me, as I practice setting healthy
    boundaries and learn from the example and
    experience of my friends in sobriety.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 23rd by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – close your eyes


Boundaries

Poor boundaries are often found in people with
addiction problems. Quite simply, in active
addiction we are prepared to compromise with our
relationships, our self-respect, our health and pretty
much everything, in order to keep our addiction
going. By doing so, we will open ourselves to all
kinds of manipulation, abuse, co-dependence, and
criminality. A chaotic lifestyle seems almost normal.
Setting new and firmer boundaries is an important
element of the positive action that we commit
ourselves to in recovery. Do I understand the need to
establish new and stronger boundaries?

Our new personality develops through the
establishment of regular habits. We can start in a
small way, perhaps teaching ourselves to say ‘no’
when we need to, on relatively minor issues. But we
must have the willingness to practice these new
principles in all our affairs. What begins as a step
into the unknown can quickly become a regular and
beneficial habit if we are prepared to trust in the
help of our Higher Power. Today I ask to be
unafraid as I set myself to the task of building selfrespect
through healthy boundaries.

Remember Mindfulness – close your eyes


Boundaries

Poor boundaries are often found in people with
addiction problems. Quite simply, in active
addiction we are prepared to compromise with our
relationships, our self-respect, our health and pretty
much everything, in order to keep our addiction
going. By doing so, we will open ourselves to all
kinds of manipulation, abuse, co-dependence, and
criminality. A chaotic lifestyle seems almost normal.
Setting new and firmer boundaries is an important
element of the positive action that we commit
ourselves to in recovery. Do I understand the need to
establish new and stronger boundaries?


Our new personality develops through the
establishment of regular habits. We can start in a
small way, perhaps teaching ourselves to say ‘no’
when we need to, on relatively minor issues. But we
must have the willingness to practice these new
principles in all our affairs. What begins as a step
into the unknown can quickly become a regular and
beneficial habit if we are prepared to trust in the
help of our Higher Power. Today I ask to be
unafraid as I set myself to the task of building selfrespect
through healthy boundaries.

Daily Reading from Recovery Days January 21st by Chris B

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Remember Mindfulness – relax your body

Fellowship


The Twelve Steps begin with the word ‘we’.
Fellowship is all about that. It is actually quite hard
to attend a fellowship meeting and not interact with
anyone, because so much of our principles and
traditions are concerned with the concept of ‘we’ –
that is, togetherness. The hand of friendship is
always extended. The group is more powerful than
the individual. Yet no member can compel, punish,
or expel anyone. Many times, we hear outsiders
exclaim I wish I belonged to that group of yours. Am
I grateful to belong to one of the Twelve Step
fellowships?

adversity creates the strongest of bonds, as
anyone who has been in the army, or a boarding
school will confirm. Being part of a football team is
totally different from being a spectator. The
intensity of the team spirit produces results, and the
same happens in recovery. We are truly blessed to
have not just our sobriety, but a worldwide support
system that is freely ours for the taking. All we have
to do is turn up. Today I pray for the sobriety, wellbeing
and happiness of the band of brothers and
sisters with whom I am proud to belong.